I wish I could teach you 
All of the things
The world will try to show you
I wish I could teach you
About vicious 24 hour news cycles
The manipulation of the media
I wish I could teach you 
About crash dieting 
The weight of being the “correct” weight
I wish I could teach you
About pop music 
The artform without artists, funyuns of creativity
I wish I could teach you 
About the Joneses 
The ludicrousness of keeping up with anyone other than yourself
I wish I could teach you
All of the things
The world will try to show you
I wish I could teach you 
In the same way a parent inoculates their child 
(hold that thought, let’s put vaccines on the syllabus, too)
Introducing their precious ones
To just enough of the sick
To keep them from becoming 
Sick 
I want to teach you the lies
The day will come
When you look in the mirror
And you don’t see 
Who the world has told you to be
And on that day
I want you to know
That the world’s idea of you
Is as irrelevant as 90’s standup
